Datasets:

soob3123
/

Stoic-QA

question stringlengths 3 298	answer stringlengths 7 9.15k	conversations listlengths 2 2
you learn by example, but seeing example means judging something ??	>If I post some incident as example to learn, is it okay? because that means I am asking others to judge something? Yes, absolutely. A judgement, or opinion, is one of the few things we actually own. You get to form your own judgements/opinions based on your gathering of knowledge from many sources. Some knowledge w...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "you learn by example, but seeing example means judging something ??" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": ">If I post some incident as example to learn, is it okay? because that means I am asking others to judge something? Yes, absolutely. A judgement, or opinion,...
How to live amor fati when it's difficult?	Sounds like maybe you get to try lots of different things, that is something you could learn what suits you, what you like to do and what you don't, how you might do things differently if you became a manager, what sort of position you might look for when you are ready to change jobs Heaps of ways you can be grateful ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How to live amor fati when it's difficult?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Sounds like maybe you get to try lots of different things, that is something you could learn what suits you, what you like to do and what you don't, how you might do things differently...
is it me or just there's a lot of dislike for stoicism on the internet ?	Zeno of Citium defined happiness as "a smooth flow of life", which was later expanded (I think by Cleanthes, but I'm not sure) into "a smooth of flow of life in accord with Nature". So yes, we can agree happiness is the end goal, but the Stoic definition of happiness is different from "experiencing nice feelings". And...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "is it me or just there's a lot of dislike for stoicism on the internet ?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Zeno of Citium defined happiness as \"a smooth flow of life\", which was later expanded (I think by Cleanthes, but I'm not sure) into \"a smooth of flow o...
How to practice patience...? How to be patient...?	In addition to the practical exercises and habits others are sharing, you might consider working on your opinion about the thing that has caused you this feeling of impatience. The Stoics argued that [passion](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stoic_passions) is the distress we feel when we are operating from certain bel...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How to practice patience...? How to be patient...?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "In addition to the practical exercises and habits others are sharing, you might consider working on your opinion about the thing that has caused you this feeling of impatienc...
Violent fantasies although I know it is wrong - how can I convince my inner chimp to let loose?	TL;DR - practice thinking more accurate thoughts about yourself and watch your urge to harm those who harm you disappear. You have to recognize that your feelings were hurt. Hurt feelings is a normal response to abuse. What exacerbates the normal processing of hurt is low self-esteem. Your OP contains words and phrase...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Violent fantasies although I know it is wrong - how can I convince my inner chimp to let loose?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "TL;DR - practice thinking more accurate thoughts about yourself and watch your urge to harm those who harm you disappear. You have...
What are the best books on Stoicism?	You can't go wrong with the original texts. Meditations, Discourses, Enchiridion, and Seneca's letters and essays. Even Musonius Rufus' Lectures are good, too. (He was Epictetus' teacher.) I've heard Pierre Hadot had some good work on Stoicism as well, but I can't personally verify that. I also enjoy The Dail...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "What are the best books on Stoicism?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "You can't go wrong with the original texts. Meditations, Discourses, Enchiridion, and Seneca's letters and essays. Even Musonius Rufus' Lectures are good, too. (He was Epictetus' tea...
How do you respond when people ask you about work?	You don't have to give a deep answer when people say that, just entertain them. The Stoics actually recommend this approach when interacting with people that don't know or don't care about philosophy. For example, if the person has lost someone dear to them then you should just offer condolences for their loss and gri...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How do you respond when people ask you about work?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "You don't have to give a deep answer when people say that, just entertain them. The Stoics actually recommend this approach when interacting with people that don't know or don...
How do you balance between stoicism and confronting/getting angry with people?	So what would happen if you took the approach of always replacing the toilet paper and putting the strainer in place? Your ego would probably take a hit and your sister would win a battle, but so what? You would save yourself being irritated and getting pissed off. However, you would gain piece of mind. Remember, i...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How do you balance between stoicism and confronting/getting angry with people?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "So what would happen if you took the approach of always replacing the toilet paper and putting the strainer in place? Your ego would probably take ...
Thoughts on Andrew Tate claiming he teaches stoic values?	Epictetus, Discourses, 2.19 comes to mind ("To those who take up the teachings of the philosophers for the sake of talk alone"). It's a great read, and a reason I don't call myself a Stoic, but a practicing stoic. He may be able to "recite all the arguments of the Stoics" (Epictetus), but we can train a parrot to repe...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Thoughts on Andrew Tate claiming he teaches stoic values?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Epictetus, Discourses, 2.19 comes to mind (\"To those who take up the teachings of the philosophers for the sake of talk alone\"). It's a great read, and a reason I don'...
Realising I don't feel fulfilled or like I've done a good job unless given external validation – advice on how to feel worthy and satisfied just from within?	Where do all your feelings come from? Feelings like validation, worthiness, confidence, hate, anger, happiness?? Understanding really where your feelings come from will open up a whole new perspective and you'll gain a sense of power and control over your life. Relying on the opinions of others to determine your se...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Realising I don't feel fulfilled or like I've done a good job unless given external validation – advice on how to feel worthy and satisfied just from within?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Where do all your feelings come from? Feelings like validation, worth...
Is not wanting to be inconvenienced selfish?	There is a difference between being a pushover and having self respect. In a place with harsher winters, walking a block to/from your garage to gain access to your car vs going downstairs into your attached garage is a huge difference. Say you need to go out 60 times in total from December 1 to March 1. Let's say 5...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Is not wanting to be inconvenienced selfish?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "There is a difference between being a pushover and having self respect. In a place with harsher winters, walking a block to/from your garage to gain access to your car vs going do...
Best books to gift a student of Stoicism?	If he doesn't have Senecas essays, you should definitely get those. Also Ciceros essays, especially 'On Ends', which is a source to the early stoics, and maybe Musonius Rufus. Those are only fragments, unfortunately, but he taught Epictetus, which makes him a wonder in my eyes.	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Best books to gift a student of Stoicism?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "If he doesn't have Senecas essays, you should definitely get those. Also Ciceros essays, especially 'On Ends', which is a source to the early stoics, and maybe Musonius Rufus. Those are...
Is Stoicism easier for introverts or extroverts?	Oh don’t feel bad I’m in same boat and started for the same reasons but it’s kind of the joke, it’s in going about these things in a round about way that gives the means to do the very things that initially got us interested in stoicism in the first place, kind of like “the best way to help yourself is to help others”,...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Is Stoicism easier for introverts or extroverts?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Oh don’t feel bad I’m in same boat and started for the same reasons but it’s kind of the joke, it’s in going about these things in a round about way that gives the means to do th...
How do you maintain a stoic mind amidst anxiousness over situations?	Stoicism doesn't mean you make the anxiety go away. It means learning to deal with it in a productive way. I struggle with anxiety as well, and something that helps me is just feeling it, understanding it for what it is, and then doing my best to move forward according to my morals and values. There are some physical ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How do you maintain a stoic mind amidst anxiousness over situations?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Stoicism doesn't mean you make the anxiety go away. It means learning to deal with it in a productive way. I struggle with anxiety as well, and something that...
so I heard a saying along the lines of "do not be heard complaining, even to yourself." How to implement that?	Crazy post OP! I'm also new to stoicism (\~ 3 weeks or something) and lately I've been thinking a lot about complaining. I've been in some situations in which I'm frustrated at something and I keep complaining about those things: I complain to myself and to others. I don't like having this attitude because I'm trying ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "so I heard a saying along the lines of \"do not be heard complaining, even to yourself.\" How to implement that?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Crazy post OP! I'm also new to stoicism (\\~ 3 weeks or something) and lately I've been thinking a lot about compl...
I'm just worried what should I do? any stoic advice?	From what you post, you do have a difficult external situation. Of course, practically you want to do what you can for your loved ones. Consider what is wise, what you can actually do for them Then accept (easy said, hard to do), that you have done all that you can. And concentrate on you. They will want you to ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "I'm just worried what should I do? any stoic advice?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "From what you post, you do have a difficult external situation. Of course, practically you want to do what you can for your loved ones. Consider what is wise, what you can ...
What does stoicism have to say about passion?	While the fact that you are irrational when you are in a passion and that, at this stage, you might have lost control might be true. It's important to remember that does not excuse passion as something indifferent that is outside our control. Succumbing to passion in the first place is well within our control and thus...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "What does stoicism have to say about passion?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "While the fact that you are irrational when you are in a passion and that, at this stage, you might have lost control might be true. It's important to remember that does not excuse ...
Recommendations for stoic passages/excerpts to meditate on after a bad day at work?	First you need to sit and think through what made the day "bad". Is it that you acted badly (non-virtuously) and made poor choices, is it that others disrespected you, or is it that events did not play out as you would have wished These are different situations For myself, I would go to my favourite Stoic book Disc...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Recommendations for stoic passages/excerpts to meditate on after a bad day at work?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "First you need to sit and think through what made the day \"bad\". Is it that you acted badly (non-virtuously) and made poor choices, is it t...
How those around me see a possible failure	>Also, your annoyance shows that you probably did care to some degree. I disagree with this assessment. It is possible that OP had some negative feelings, and they were spilling into his interactions. However, it's also possible that his annoyance resulted from the interactions. It's just as you described. >It is bas...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How those around me see a possible failure" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": ">Also, your annoyance shows that you probably did care to some degree. I disagree with this assessment. It is possible that OP had some negative feelings, and they were spilling into ...
How to be Economically Stoic?	Friend, I would like to challenge you on something. I hear a lack of Courage in your voice. There is more to do than protest to help our world. Namely, organize. It can be challenging to engage with and gain the support of others, and you certainly won't succeed in every case, but it can have an even greater impact th...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How to be Economically Stoic?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Friend, I would like to challenge you on something. I hear a lack of Courage in your voice. There is more to do than protest to help our world. Namely, organize. It can be challenging to engage wi...
Are Mantras a bad idea?	You have posted with the flair "Seeking Stoic Advice", so my first question would be - are you trying to follow Stoic ideas with readings and practices and these mantras are an 'extra', or do you think that having these mantras is somehow Stoic? On the whole I would think that the mantras you mention are of very littl...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Are Mantras a bad idea?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "You have posted with the flair \"Seeking Stoic Advice\", so my first question would be - are you trying to follow Stoic ideas with readings and practices and these mantras are an 'extra', or do you think...
Smoking?	Wow. There are some self-righteous, preachy people when it comes to this. People acting like Stoics never got drunk, overate, and let’s pretend like some of them didn’t own slaves. How many of you eat pepperoni, sausage, bacon, deli meats? Go see what the American Cancer Society says about that while you’re up there on...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Smoking?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Wow. There are some self-righteous, preachy people when it comes to this. People acting like Stoics never got drunk, overate, and let’s pretend like some of them didn’t own slaves. How many of you eat pepperoni, sausag...
What is a quote you live by?	it’s hard to give just a single maxim, because certain maxims will be relevant today while others will be more relevant next week. it depends on circumstances. however, there are a few maxims that i recall regardless now then. „As within, so without; as without, so within.“ this is probably one of my favourites, remi...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "What is a quote you live by?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "it’s hard to give just a single maxim, because certain maxims will be relevant today while others will be more relevant next week. it depends on circumstances. however, there are a few maxims that i...
What Can We Learn from Seneca Today?	I have just read and enjoyed that David Fideler article. Thank you for posting.	[ { "role": "user", "content": "What Can We Learn from Seneca Today?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "I have just read and enjoyed that David Fideler article. Thank you for posting." } ]
Stoic approach to someone trying to steal my girlfriend?	No one can steal a girlfriend because their not ours, the person who chooses is them. Do we really want to hold someone hostage if they wish to leave? What about someone who entertains it? Well that’s our choice in the matter. Epictetus points out if you value your partners looks then why would you be surprised if ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Stoic approach to someone trying to steal my girlfriend?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "No one can steal a girlfriend because their not ours, the person who chooses is them. Do we really want to hold someone hostage if they wish to leave? What about someon...
How can I read Meditations and Stoic Journal as a Beginner.	The Meditations can be a really profound or confusing read depending on the person, most people read it a few times before they start getting it. If it’s your first Stoic book you have to know that Marcus isn’t trying to explain the terms because this book was his journal. Not only that but the advice he’s giving m...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How can I read Meditations and Stoic Journal as a Beginner." }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "The Meditations can be a really profound or confusing read depending on the person, most people read it a few times before they start getting it. If it’s your first ...
Dealing with jealousy?	“He who compares himself with that which is below him is unhappy, and he who compares himself with that which is above him is proud.” - Epictetus “A person’s worth is measured by the worth of what they value.” - Seneca “If you live in harmony with nature, you will never be poor; if you live according to what others ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Dealing with jealousy?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "“He who compares himself with that which is below him is unhappy, and he who compares himself with that which is above him is proud.” - Epictetus “A person’s worth is measured by the worth of what they ...
What if I’m just not attractive at all to women? What should I do?	Focus less on building a 'you' that women will like, and more on building a 'you' that you can enjoy spending time with. You might be surprised at how people respond to that, and how much it will change your life for the better. It will make you less needy. Less desperate to get into a relationship, any relationship....	[ { "role": "user", "content": "What if I’m just not attractive at all to women? What should I do?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Focus less on building a 'you' that women will like, and more on building a 'you' that you can enjoy spending time with. You might be surprised at how people ...
Is it possible to break/change an impression I've made upon a person despite it already being strong? If so, how?	Cool man i think you got this. You seem more marure than i was in school (or maybe now too 🤔) And yeha is ee what you mena but i think lvoe is love you know, some is stronger than other, some is more dillusional than the other, soke more obssessive or temporary, or w.e. but i dontsee it in as bad light as you do as l...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Is it possible to break/change an impression I've made upon a person despite it already being strong? If so, how?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Cool man i think you got this. You seem more marure than i was in school (or maybe now too 🤔) And yeha is ee wh...
How do you determine your goals/values?	Lawrence Becker has a fantastic book called Modern Stoicism and he tackles this from the perspective of imagining where Stoicism would be today if the school had never shut down and continued to exist through the centuries. There's a whole section where he lays out a logical argument for precisely how to discern one's ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How do you determine your goals/values?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Lawrence Becker has a fantastic book called Modern Stoicism and he tackles this from the perspective of imagining where Stoicism would be today if the school had never shut down and conti...
Preferred translation of the Enichridion and Letters from a Stoic?	Seneca letters from Chicago press (blue book) is the most comprehensive and well translate available. For Enchiridion some prefer Robin Waterfield translation, i do personally have a slight preference for Robin Hard. You can also check this reading if you want some other books https://traditionalstoicism.com/recommen...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Preferred translation of the Enichridion and Letters from a Stoic?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Seneca letters from Chicago press (blue book) is the most comprehensive and well translate available. For Enchiridion some prefer Robin Waterfield translation, ...
Is it “cowardly” to be in the middle/generally apathetic?	>I’ve always been interested in stoicism (though I can never figure out how to apply it to my life) This one seems easy to address. Find a quote you like, and then think about it. "All cruelty springs from weakness" When you act cruelly, or you see someone acting cruelly, understand that it's coming from a place of ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Is it “cowardly” to be in the middle/generally apathetic?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": ">I’ve always been interested in stoicism (though I can never figure out how to apply it to my life) This one seems easy to address. Find a quote you like, and then thin...
Overcoming failure?	You cannot change what has happened, so let it go. Sure, learn from it and don't make the same mistake again, but there's no actual value in beating yourself up and making yourself miserable. What you do now, is to make a plan. A study plan so that you go through the material and are well placed to pass next time ...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Overcoming failure?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "You cannot change what has happened, so let it go. Sure, learn from it and don't make the same mistake again, but there's no actual value in beating yourself up and making yourself miserable. What you do ...
Recite as a mantra?	Where does this usage of mantra come from? Looking into Shingon Buddhism, they chant mantras to become one with God/the universe/Vairocana; and most of the time it’s just the god’s name you’re trying to invoke. If you chant “it’s all okay” every time something happens, what does that mean? I fell and broke my nose, me...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Recite as a mantra?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "Where does this usage of mantra come from? Looking into Shingon Buddhism, they chant mantras to become one with God/the universe/Vairocana; and most of the time it’s just the god’s name you’re trying to invo...
"The best revenge is not to be like that"Meditations 6:6. But what if it is?	It's just, revenge is a word, a powerful one at that. And I think using if seemed to hide everything I wrote in the post. There was an element of "social correction". An Aurelius quote about truth and a clear understanding that my focus should be on "what is up to me". Should we ignore things we know to be socially wro...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "\"The best revenge is not to be like that\"Meditations 6:6. But what if it is?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "It's just, revenge is a word, a powerful one at that. And I think using if seemed to hide everything I wrote in the post. There was an element of \"...
What to do in an unfair situation?	I am sure this is really difficult for you. What will complaining accomplish? Complaining can become a habit and close many doors into your future. Believe it or not when we complain and get validation it’s a hit of dopamine, this creates a deeper strong possibility to use this as a means to navigate...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "What to do in an unfair situation?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "I am sure this is really difficult for you.\r \r What will complaining accomplish? \r Complaining can become a habit and close many doors into your future. \r \r Believe it or not wh...
What do you do when try your best but you fail?	So you will only try something if you know you will succeed? Where's the fun in that?! It's the fact that you could fail that makes it exciting. If you know you will never fail at anything you ever try, life becomes boring. Why do you think trust find kids are so unhappy? **They already have everything they need. Th...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "What do you do when try your best but you fail?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "So you will only try something if you know you will succeed? Where's the fun in that?! It's the fact that you could fail that makes it exciting. If you know you will never fail...
How do I deal with romantic rejection from a close friend?	'Hoes love drama" - Epicticus. But for real, this is one of those things where she gets a short term excuse to brag/complain about and feel superior in her friend group for being "special" among her friend group temporarily. Best thing you can do is completely ignore her for awhile but don't avoid her. Just go ab...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How do I deal with romantic rejection from a close friend?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "'Hoes love drama\" - Epicticus. But for real, this is one of those things where she gets a short term excuse to brag/complain about and feel superior in her friend gr...
Stoicism and crying ?	I cried today, a month and half after being dumped. It's okay to cry. It's okay to feel emotions. What is not okay is making foolish decisions due to these emotions. Random example.. last time I got dumped (before this time haha), I started sleeping around casually in the vain attempt to hide from my emotions. I took...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "Stoicism and crying ?" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "I cried today, a month and half after being dumped. It's okay to cry. It's okay to feel emotions. What is not okay is making foolish decisions due to these emotions. Random example.. last time I got dump...
How Patience Fosters Peace	"Patience can often be followed by a powerful Marcus Aurelius quote" There is no power in a Marcus Aurelius quote, or any other quote. Any power to speak of comes from our judgment of that quote. That quote is "life-changing", "worthless woo woo", "fascinating", "irritating", whatever. All this comes from our judgmen...	[ { "role": "user", "content": "How Patience Fosters Peace" }, { "role": "assistant", "content": "\"Patience can often be followed by a powerful Marcus Aurelius quote\" There is no power in a Marcus Aurelius quote, or any other quote. Any power to speak of comes from our judgment of that quote. T...